Its funny, I've been a dockhand for the entire summer and have heard all those questions atleast once. But it's still wildly entertaining for me. Im now just starting to think, "o, I've heard this one before".

Our CP does it best though,
Pax: "what's the inflight movie?
CP: "Porn, and before you ask what the inflight meal is, its beer and I put some underneath your seat. "
Pax: "hahaha right on man..."

Usually the the custies are fat and jolly and do not bother the cojo (or swamper) or the captain until we dock at destination (when I get to the odd swaping job) and "say you guys want a beer ?"

"No, but dont forget to leave some in the float compartment (caravan) for us tonight"