ATC encounters

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ypamcvey
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by ypamcvey »

GilletteNorth wrote:Two airlines that fly out of La Ronge, TransWest and Westwind. One day Westwind flight calls up for departure advisory:

WEW: Prince Albert radio, Westwind 702"

Radio quickly responds: "Transwest 702 La Ronge radio"
Hahah that's great. They call us La Ronge radio quite a bit as well. It's nice being called "Prince Albert Tower" by some of the yankees that fly here though.
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grimey
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by grimey »

ypamcvey wrote: Hahah that's great. They call us La Ronge radio quite a bit as well. It's nice being called "Prince Albert Tower" by some of the yankees that fly here though.
I got called Thompson approach. I swear it didn't go to my head. :) Was kinda worried if he knew something about the upcoming traffic that I didn't, though. :wink:
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roger.roger
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by roger.roger »

A controller in montreal responed in Quebec french to Air France.

The response from Air France was "as long as your not going to speak french neither are we, english only please"
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Braun
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by Braun »

roger.roger wrote:A controller in montreal responed in Quebec french to Air France.

The response from Air France was "as long as your not going to speak french neither are we, english only please"
English or French they still don't understand anything.
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hovergirl
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by hovergirl »

This happened at the FSS station where I work. We routinely check for landing gear of aircraft on final, and a co-worker was looking for the gear of a Rockwell Turbo Commander, a bird dog returning from a forest fire. They have very short nose gear, and since he was landing on the far end of the runway, even with binoculars, it was pretty hard to see.
After the guy landed, she said "I almost had to ask you to pull up, your gear was so short, I couldn't see it."
He replied "oh, I didn't even know you check for landing gear."
And from pilot of the tanker, still 10 miles out, "You're not the first woman to tell him his gear was too short."

We laughed about that for a while! :lol:
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by Prairie Chicken »

Many years ago, back when we were switching from using registration letters to phonetics, at or near YQR, a pilot fondly referred to as Ajax was flying an aircraft with marks which ended in FU. ATC were trying to convince him to follow the new protocol and respond with “Foxtrot Uniform”. The response, consistently, was F U.

Also some time ago, somewhere over the prairies on a dark and very, very quiet night, out of the silence came “quack, quack”. A minute or so goes by with no other comms, then again “quack, quack”. A second transmitter comes on immediately “BANG!”, then from the first transmitter “quack, quack, quack, quack!” Then the silence resumed.
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by Old Dog Flying »

PC: I remember Ajax very well...he haunted the RFC lounge quite frequently. I also remember one night flying session before phonetics with AKP, AKT, and ZKT chasing one another around the circuit...and number 3 would ask for a "Close pattern" every other circuit giving a certain female controller a very bad time trying to remember the sequence. Just think about it! It was all pre-arranged in the club house before we launched. :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by Prairie Chicken »

Old Dog, we likely know each other. I had my share of pints at the RFC as well. Ah, the good old days!

Speaking of ATC encounters, we could probably go on and on about the old days at CYQR, or just Ajax in particular. I believe the QR tower was known for the most inappropriate comments on frequency in the entire country, much to the frustration of TC. Pilots, ATC, engineers—everyone spent time at the RFC it seemed, and there was more than one plot hatched there. They were all fun!
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by Old Dog Flying »

Image

We were dubbed the "Snowflake" formation with this plus one other by the guys at CYMJ. I had to go into Regina for aircraft parts for one of the airshow performers and so used the call-sign "Snowflake One" as a joke.

"Regina Tower Snowflake One"....very long pause followed by a curious responce...
"Regina , Snowflake One...Belle Plaine with ATIS ( ) landing Regina"

Before the tower guy could answer I heard...

"Regina Tower...Snowflake Two"...which got my mojo going...this was going to be fun! The pilot of Two was a YQR tower guy moonlighting as an instructor

This was quickly followed by ..you guessed it..

"Regina Tower , Snowflake Three by the beacon" a red and white twin...AC Diesel 9

"OK you guys, you've had your fun now who is who out there..?"

Only later did I find out that the tower guy had been given the nickname "Snowflake" he thought that the whole world was pulling his leg.
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by Prairie Chicken »

Snowflake might have been a little sensitive but he was a good controller. Two of the regulars from the RFC decided to moon him. Snowflake was working the Tower position and two un-named pilots went up in a light twin. They advised Tower they had a gear problem, and could they do a low pass by the tower to have him check the gear. Snowflake had his binoculars so trained on the gear that he missed the big moon cheeks up against the right window!
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by Old Dog Flying »

PC: As I recall the pilot of the twin was one of your controllers and he had a long history of that sort of thing. He parked his BE-18 in front of the flying club one night and in the morning my secretary looked out the front window and remarked "Look, Norm's airplane is laying eggs"...Coors cans!

I do believe that he pulled the big moon one day with the Minister of Transport getting out of the Jetstar...and of course the controllers had nothing to do with plastering the infamous bumperstickers on the Jetstar..."English is the International Language of Aviation" with the Beaver throttling the little green animal from the swamp.

Barney
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by Prairie Chicken »

Hello Barney! I think I`ve got you now. At first I thought you were the `Barney Rubble`that was part of the “breakfast” cooked on the carpet of the RFC on a few occasions, along with our blind air traffic controller and another pilot, but a review of your previous posts straighened that out. It’s been a long time!

No, I didn’t think it was the BE-18 that did the moon job on Snowflake, but it certainly could have been the same pilot/BE-18 owner. I thought that a/c was a more reputable type such as a Cessna or Navajo, and possibly flown by another ATC (terminal) type.

I’ll pm you, but I was there for that infamous attack on the Minister of Transport’s (Otto Lang as I recall) jet that night. I don’t recall my exact duties, and don`t recall who the driver of the get-away Cherokee was!
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by G.N. Thompson »

Then there was the time the ATCer in the cojo seat arrived, dawg tired, jet lagged and hungry at customs in AU. The customs dude comes aboard, complete with moustache, military shirt, shorts, stockings, highly polished shoes and the clipboard with 400 questions.
name...,postal code...,sin...,mother's name...,purpose of trip...,money on hand...etc etc.
Gets down to "Do you have a criminal record?"

"No...didn't realize it was still a prerequisite"

oops
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mathewc
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by mathewc »

I was taxiing to the active with a Dash-8 and a Caravan. Both other aircraft have very very similar callsigns and the controller had already mixed them up a few times.

"ABC... JEEEEEEESSSSUUSSS CCCHHHHRRRIIIIIIIIIIISSSTTTT! ABDC...."

A buddy and I had a good laugh while taxiing out. I can't blame the guy for getting frustrated though!
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VikVaughan
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by VikVaughan »

Deadly hazard reported on final:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L9wxGRdwexg
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by SquearlFSS »

Working the Muskoka RAAS one busy summer day.

Ontario Provincial Police A-Star: "Timmins(YTS) Radio, This is XXXX, 8 N Low level southbound into the zone"
ME: " XXXX, YTS Radio, Active runway is 36 two aircraft in the circuit, and one about to depart on a local flight westbound, what are your intentions"
OPP A-Star: "Standby one"
......
ME: "XXXX PA28 airborne now heading towards lake muskoka, are you inbound for landing?...what are your intentions?"
OPP A-Star: " YTS Radio, this is XXXX, we are not landing , we are on drugs"

After I had a good chuckle I got my supervisor to save that one...

In YTS my buddy working, has a BE20 taxing for a VFR training flight:

YTS Radio:" Voyageur Trainer one, active rwy 03 Navajo on 2 mile fnl, Caravan 10 North inbound for the left downwind"
VAL01T: " roger we have the HO in site and we check the VAN inbound, holding short of 03 for now"
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by SquearlFSS »

Another one my buddy had....

working the position


Radio: "thunder 105 request you hold in position, there is a moose crossing at the intersection .....intentions unknown.."
THU105:" Roger...we aren't talking to him either so we'll hold"
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by pilotman15 »

Here' a couple out of the unofficial log of CYAM off their tower website

GABC on his way to the new hanger via Golf and Charlie stops on the apron and requests. " Ground, can I stop here and drop one!" Ground... "Sure.... Does it smell?"



" Sir was that landing intentional or were you shot down!!"



"Tower Cardinal N1234 ....I'm on my way in to CIU what are your winds in Canada?" ...Tower.." Well I can't speak for all of Canada, but in my little corner they're 240 @ 5 ."




Digging for braking action reports....

"ABC Tower, did you use the brakes at all?"

"No Tower, but the captain says that if he would have used the brakes, it would have been poor." ???



This is the best one that I've ever heard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1999

"Soo Ground, FHTU is on the ramp, request taxi to the active for some airwork at the VOR".

" FHTU, Soo ground, runway 12, winds 360/7, altimeter 2960, taxi foxtrot to runway 12".

............." Soo ground, is runway 30 plowed?, because we'd like runway 30".

" FHTU Soo ground, runway 30 is not plowed but runway 12 is!".

" Roger Soo Ground, we'll take runway 12 then."


Check out the Sault Tower website at http://members.shaw.ca/djcat/ for a few other funny transmissions and a nice tower history of CYAM.
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pto
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by pto »

ACA516: Any ride reports this morning?

Controller: Nope, no complaints at all.

ACA516: Can we start?

C: I'd kinda rather you didn't!
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Jonesie
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Re: ATC encounters

Post by Jonesie »

The controller working a busy pattern told the 727 on downwind to make a three-sixty--do a complete circle, a move normally used to provide spacing between aircraft.
The pilot of the 727 complained, "Don't you know it costs us two thousand dollars to make even a one-eighty in this airplane?"
Without missing a beat the controller replied, "Roger, give me four thousand dollars' worth."
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Billund ATC: Gliders 82 and D5, state position and altitude?
82: Overhead Coal Lake, 6400 feet.
D5: Same position, same altitude.
ATC (cool, dry voice): So should I go get my collision report form ?
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Several planes were running up and waiting to take off, many Cessna's including a 337. With all the students and several similar call signs, the controllers were getting a tad confused. The controller finally asked: "Cessna 123YZ, are you the Skymaster?"

A slightly confused voice with an indeterminate accent replied, after a moment, "Well, my instructor says that I am very good, but I do not think that I would yet be considered the 'Skymaster.'"
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A crew in a Baron was taxiing at LAX back in the sixties and encountered one of the (then) new 747's. Both pilot and co- were all eyes as both aircraft approached the same intersection.
Baron: Uh, ATC, verify you want me to taxi in front of the 747.
ATC: Yeah, it's OK. He's not hungry.
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A C152 pilot was asked to report his height prior to clearance to enter the zone, replied: "Flight Level Three Thousand, Seven Hundred", upon which the Controller very smartly replied, "Roger, prepare to fire retro-rockets and re-enter the atmosphere!"
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C-150: Tower this is N-1234 can you give us a ground speed please?
Tower: Roger N-1234 we show you at 110 knots
Mooney: (Showing off a bit) tower this is N-5678 can you give US a ground speed please?
Tower: Roger that N-5678 we show you at 201 knots
F-18: (Showing off a lot and said with a Texas drawl). Heh Heh.. tower how about XXXX, can you give US a ground speed please?
Tower: Roger XXXX we show you at 580 knots.
... then in a distant crackly voice,
"Tower, we'd like a ground speed too please..."
Tower: Ummmm ahhh .... must be something wrong with our equipment here, I show you at 1500 knots sir.
"No sir, this is a SR-71. Thank you for the reading."
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Another student, a not too bright woman, was coming in for a landing. The radio in the FBO was set to the ground freq. It seems that she landed on the taxi way.
The ground controller told her, "please call 555-9876 after you park the plane".
She answered, "No thank you sir, I'm already married."
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Cessna: Bay Approach, Cessna 12345 over South County Airport at four thousand feet, request permission to land at San Jose.
Bay Approach: Cessna 12345, Squawk 4567, and do you have Hotel? (the current SJC ATIS)
Cessna: Negative, we're going to stay with my sister-in-law.
American 123: Does your sister-in-law have any extra rooms?
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:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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